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I still choose soccer

FFBBEH Frisco, Texas, USA. 10th Feb, 2016. Mexico defender Janelly Farias (3) during the match between Puerto Rico and Mexico during the CONCACAF 2016 Olympic Qualifying Championship at Toyota Stadium, in Frisco, Texas. Shane Roper/CSM/Alamy Live News

A week before the 2008 U20 Women’s World Cup, I blew out my knee in our last scrimmage against Argentina. I was devastated. I cried the entire flight home, knowing that I was missing the World Cup and would have to undergo surgery to reconstruct my ACL and repair my meniscus. I was also dating my first girlfriend and was certain that my family hated me for it. Though I was hopeful that they would grow to be more accepting over time (as they have), I would have given anything that summer to be out on the field rather than laid up at home.

As disappointed as I was, I knew I’d come back stronger. What I didn’t know was that that was just the beginning of my injury woes.

In January, 2017, a week before training camp with Mexico, my body went into shock as a result of overtraining. I had to miss camp and another opportunity to represent my country. June of that same year, just before another national camp, I fractured my back.

Bad luck, I told myself. Nothing was going my way, but I was determined to push through. By February, 2018, I was finally back on the field for Apollon Ladies FC, with World Cup qualifiers just around the corner.

Then I tore my Achilles.

WHOA.

Fucking whoa. That’s all I could think. I was sitting outside the imaging center in Cyprus when the doctor told me.

I immediately called my brother, 7,000 miles away back home. I cried into the phone. I couldn’t even breathe normally. I was gasping for air as I sobbed and tried to explain to him that my soccer career was probably over, which meant that my life was, too. He was able to talk me down, and his voice put me at ease for a few minutes. Then we hung up and I started hyperventilating again. I just kept thinking, there’s no way I can do this again.

But I knew I had to.

Because all I ever wanted was to make the World Cup roster and represent Mexico. And I had come so close, only to have the opportunity ripped away by injury. But after the initial shock, I knew I still wanted to play soccer. And I knew that I just needed to be healthy in order to play at the highest level.

Still, after having my Achilles repaired in a foreign country, far, far from home, it wasn’t just my body that I had to rehab. Sitting on the sidelines and dealing with PT, all while living halfway around the world from my friends and family, had caused me to fall into a depression.

Today, I can tell you that no matter the injury, the mental and emotional pain is always greater than the physical. There are programs for rehabbing all kinds of physical injuries, but there aren’t any guidebooks for dealing with the heartbreak and the self-doubt that comes with them.

What carried me through it all was my love of soccer. Even when I wanted to quit, I refused to, knowing that all the hard work, both mental and physical, would be worth it once I was back on the field. Five months after my Achilles surgery, I was starting to see a light at the end of the tunnel.

So of course, I immediately tore the labrum in my right shoulder, missed World Cup qualifiers, and had to watch from home as my country failed to qualify.

Back came all the doubt and depression. All I could do was ask myself, Why?

Why does this keep happening to me?

Why am I always fighting just to get on the field?

Why do I keep coming this close, but only this close, to living out my dreams?

I still don’t have the answers to these questions.

What I do know — what I’ve always known — is that soccer remains my greatest, truest love. No injury has or ever will change that. It is a love that drives me forward whenever life gets rough. A love that is unconditional. A love that lets me live freely, without judgement.

When I’m on the field, totally consumed by the game, there’s no better feeling. And no matter how many times I get knocked down (at this point, I can’t even keep track), that feeling always drives me to get back up.

All of the heartbreak — the inexplicable pain, the emotional struggles, the tears that stream down my face even as I write this — has made me as resilient as they come. Every physical scar has left a mental scar that has made me stronger, wiser. I know I can’t always control what happens to me, but I can choose how I respond. I can choose to dwell on the negative, or I can choose to be proactive. I can choose to give up, or I can choose to persevere.

I know that someday, maybe soon, my playing career will be over. But until then, I choose to enjoy the time that I have. I choose to play and to go out on my own terms. I choose to fight.

Barcelona aims to end Emma Hayes UWCL dreams in semifinal

BARCELONA, SPAIN - MARCH 28: Jonatan Giraldez of FC Barcelona gestures during the UEFA Women's Champions League 2023/24 Quarter Final Leg Two match between FC Barcelona and SK Brann at Estadi Johan Cruyff on March 28, 2024 in Barcelona, Spain. (Photo by Eric Alonso - UEFA/UEFA via Getty Images)

Barcelona is set to take on Chelsea once again in the Champions League semifinals, and coach Jonatan Giráldez has his sights set on ending Chelsea’s run. 

It’s a rematch of last year’s semifinal, only this time both coaches are coaching in their final leg of UWCL matches with their respective teams. Giráldez will depart Barcelona for the NWSL’s Washington Spirit upon the conclusion of the season, while Chelsea’s Emma Hayes is set to take over the USWNT. 

While Giráldez has won the Champions League before with Barcleona, it’s the one trophy that has eluded Hayes in her time at Chelsea. 

"Emma's legacy is in what she has done at Chelsea and the growth [at the club] over more than 10 years," Giráldez said. "She has done a magnificent job at the club. The next [manager] will have bar set very high because she has done amazing things.

"She will hope to go out with a Champions League [trophy], but we are here to try and make sure that doesn't happen and to bring it home, which is our objective."

In her time with Chelsea, Hayes has won six Women’s Super League titles and five FA Cups. Chelsea has made the UWCL final just once – in 2021, when the team lost to Barcelona. Barcelona then ended Chelsea’s hopes again last year, winning 2-1 on aggregate in the semifinal before winning their second UWCL trophy in four years. 

The first leg of this year’s semifinal is set to be played at Barcelona’s Olympic Stadium, with Chelsea then playing at home in the second leg. 

"It will be a very even tie," Giráldez added. "Chelsea are a great side and the club have invested in the women's game in recent years -- and it shows. They've done well in the Champions League and are in great form, but so are we. I would have preferred to have the second leg at home, but it's not something we can control."

USWNT midfielder Korbin Albert issues apology for social media activity

Korbin Albert. (Photo by John Todd/ISI Photos/Getty Images)

USWNT midfielder Korbin Albert has apologized for past social media activity that appeared to support anti-LGBTQIA+ content and for liking an Instagram post that made light of Megan Rapinoe’s injury in her final professional game. 

The posts caused Rapinoe to call out the midfielder, who now wears Rapinoe’s No. 15, on Instagram, addressing her note to “the people who want to hide behind ‘my beliefs’” and saying that “all you believe in is hate.”

Rapinoe’s comments were then shared by USWNT teammate Becky Sauerbrunn, as well as others like Lynn Williams, Sam Mewis and Kristie Mewis. 

Among the posts reposted to Albert’s TikTok was a Christian sermon talking about how being gay and “feeling transgender” is wrong. The posts surfaced earlier this week and garnered widespread attention among fans of women’s soccer. 

Albert started in Paris Saint-Germain’s Champions League game on Thursday, scoring in the 70th minute. Following the game, and hours after Rapinoe’s post, Albert posted an apology to her Instagram. 

"I want to sincerely apologize for my actions on social media," Albert wrote in a post shared on her Instagram story late Thursday. "Liking and sharing posts that are offensive, insensitive and hurtful was immature and disrespectful which was never my intent. I'm really disappointed in myself and am deeply sorry for the hurt that I have caused to my teammates, other players, fans, friends and anyone who was offended.

“I truly believe that everyone should feel safe and respected everywhere and on all playing fields. I know my actions have not lived up to that and for that I sincerely apologize. It’s an honor and a privilege to play this sport on the world stage and I promise to do better.”

U.S. Soccer has yet to address Albert’s social media activity, although she is set to join the USWNT next week in camp ahead of the SheBelieves Cup, which starts on April 6.

Megan Rapinoe confirms post was directed at Korbin Albert

(Photo by Brad Smith/ISI Photos/USSF/Getty Images for USSF)

Former USWNT forward Megan Rapinoe took to Instagram to implicitly call out current USWNT midfielder Korbin Albert’s past social media activity.

Albert, who now wears Rapinoe’s No. 15, came under fire this week for previous social media activity that included her appearing to support anti-LGBTQIA+ content and like an Instagram post that made light of Rapinoe’s injury in her final professional game. 

Rapinoe tore her Achilles in the NWSL championship, and Albert, via a screengrab, appeared to like a post from a meme account that read: “God taking time off performing miracles to make sure Megan Rapinoe sprains her ankle in her final ever game.”

Albert’s Instagram handle appeared to have liked the post in the screengrab, although the original appears to have been deleted as of March 28. 

On Thursday, Rapinoe posted her reaction to Albert’s activity via an Instagram story.

“To the people who want to hide behind ‘my beliefs’ I would just ask one question, are you making any time of space safer, more inclusive, more whole, any semblance of better, bringing the best out of anyone?” she wrote. “… because if you aren’t all you believe in is hate. And Kids are literally killing themselves because of this hate. Wake TF up! Yours Truly, #15.”

She signed off her note saying, “For all my trans homies enduring this horrific treatment day in and day out, I see you and hear you and I am WITH YOU.”

USWNT captain Becky Sauerbrunn reshared the post on Thursday, captioning it, “Well said.” Other former teammates and current USWNT members also shared the post, including Lynn Williams, Abby Dahlkemper, Sam Mewis and Kristie Mewis. 

When asked for comment by The Athletic, Rapinoe said the post was a response to Albert’s social media activity, but also noted that her focus is on protecting queer lives and sharing concerns over how online discussions and anti-trans sentiment can have real-world consequences.

Rapinoe isn’t the only USWNT member to have supported trans rights. Long-time captain Becky Sauerbrunn wrote an op-ed for a Missouri newspaper in support of allowing trans girls and women to play sports. In the final game of the 2022 SheBelieves Cup, held in Texas, players wore wristbands with the words “Protect Trans Kids” on the same day that Texas Gov. Greg Abbott called for state employees to report the parents of trans children to the authorities. 

Following her Champions League match with club team Paris Saint-Germain, Albert posted an apology to Instagram.

“I want to sincerely apologize for my actions on social media,” she wrote. “Liking and sharing posts that are offensive, insensitive and hurtful was immature and disrespectful which was never my intent.

“I truly believe that everyone should feel safe and respected everywhere and on all playing fields. I know my actions have not lived up to that and for that I sincerely apologize. It’s an honor and a privilege to play this sport on the world stage and I promise to do better.”

USC’s McKenzie Forbes: From Gap Year to the NCAA Tournament

As part of our 1-v-1 video series, USC’s India Otto sat down to interview her teammate McKenzie Forbes. 

Here are five things to know from our conversation with the graduate transfer from Folsom, California.

#1 Inspired by USC’s Head Coach, Lindsay Gottlieb, McKenzie wants to be a basketball coach or work in the front office in the future.

When weighing in on what makes a good coach, McKenzie said x’s and o’s are important but “Coaching is a lot of relationship managing and people managing. I think you have to be a good people person and be able to build those relationships, but also in that same breath, you can’t be afraid to have people dislike you in moments. I think that’s a big part of leadership.”

#2 McKenzie says the trajectory of her career changed when she made the decision to transfer from Cal to Harvard.

 In order to transfer, she was forced to take a gap year and spend a lot of time in the gym. “I completely transformed my body and, going into the Harvard season, felt like I was a completely different player. Going to Harvard and playing in a more mid-major conference, I had the ball in my hands a lot more than I might have if I transferred to another Power 5. It really developed other parts of my game.”

#3 How does McKenzie think USC will do in the Women’s College Basketball Tournament?

“I’m not going to give a typical interview answer. I want a Final Four. We have that potential and capability. Like why not? Why not us? I think we have all the pieces.”

#4 Her older brother, Marcus, was her biggest mentor growing up.

“He was basically my trainer from Elementary school on until he went to college.”

#5 Fun facts about Forbes:

She can juggle and she was the quarterback of her Pop Warner football team. “I was slow but I could throw it!”

Watch the full conversation on the Just Women’s Sports YouTube channel.

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